Savage Street Church of Christ

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Beautiful Things to Bring to Marriage 

Don Ruhl • Savage Street, Grants Pass, Oregon • June 29, In the year of our Lord, 2014

Scripture Reader and Reading: Carl Peugh – Colossians 3.12–14

Prelude: 

1. Oh, the joys of marriage! 
   1. ”Marriage is a lot like the army, everyone complains, but you’d be surprised at the number that re-enlist.” – James Garner
   2. ”Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards.” – Benjamin Franklin
   3. ”Don’t assume that every sad-eyed woman has loved and lost—she may have got him.”
   4. ”A diplomatic husband said to his wife, ‘How do you expect me to remember your birthday when you never look any older?’”
   5. ”It takes a smart spouse to have the last word and not use it.”
   6. ”The honeymoon is over when he phones to say he’ll be late for supper and she’s already left a note that it’s in the refrigerator.” – Bill Lawrence
   7. ”Marriage is like twirling a baton, handsprings, or eating with chopsticks. It looks easy till you try it.”
   8. ”Some husbands are living proof that a woman can take a joke.”
2. What does the Bible teach? 

Persuasion: 

1. Submission 
   1. “Figures,” someone says, “that he would start with the women!”
      1. Actually, I am starting with the men!
   2. Submission is
      1. giving yourself to another.
      2. Making yourself subject to his or her wishes.
   3. Husbands, submit to your wives.
      1. Not to another woman.
         
         19As a loving deer and a graceful doe,
         Let her breasts satisfy you at all times;
         And always be enraptured with her love.
         (Proverbs 5.19)
         
         1. Unfortunately, I think our attention is on letting her breasts satisfy us.
         2. That might be part of the text, but not its first meaning.
      2. Notice how it starts from verse 15,
         
         15Drink water from your own cistern,
         And running water from your own well.
         16Should your fountains be dispersed abroad,
         Streams of water in the streets?
         17Let them be only your own,
         And not for strangers with you.
         18Let your fountain be blessed,
         And rejoice with the wife of your youth.
         19As a loving deer and a graceful doe,
         Let her breasts satisfy you at all times;
         And always be enraptured with her love.
         20For why should you, my son, be enraptured by an immoral woman,
         And be embraced in the arms of a seductress?
         (Proverbs 5.15–20)
         
      3. Be devoted to her happiness,
         
         5 “When a man has taken a new wife, he shall not go out to war or be charged with any business; he shall be free at home one year, and bring happiness to his wife whom he has taken” (Deu 24.5).
         
      4. Consider what the Lord told Abraham,
         
         12 “Whatever Sarah has said to you, listen to her voice…” (Gen 21.12).
         
   4. Wives, submit to your husbands.
      
      22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body. 24 Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything (Eph 5.22–24).
      
2. Love for God 
   1. He teaches how do everything with everyone.
   2. He provides all the relationship-building skills.
      1. The fruit of the Spirit
         
         22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law (Gal 5.22–23).
         
      2. The Beatitudes
   3. Make God the center of your marriage.
3. Love for One Another
   
   12 Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering; 13 bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do. 14 But above all these things put on love, which is the bond of perfection (Col 3.12–14).

   1 Therefore if there is any consolation in Christ, if any comfort of love, if any fellowship of the Spirit, if any affection and mercy, 2 fulfill my joy by being like-minded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind. 3 Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself. 4 Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others (Phi 2.1–4).
   

4. The Golden Rule
   
   12 “Therefore, whatever you want men to do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets” (Matt 7.12).
   
   1. Don’t forget to practice it at home.
   2. “Therefore”—conclusion of verses 7–11.
5. Spiritual Understanding 
   1. Wives, emphasize the inward,
      
      1 Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives, 2 when they observe your chaste conduct accompanied by fear. 3 Do not let your adornment be merely outward—arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel— 4 rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God (1Pe 3.1–4).
      
   2. Husbands, be understanding,
      
      7 Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered (1Pe 3.7).