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05_13_2018_HowToKeepFromBeingADifficultPerson_DonRuhl
How to Keep from Being a Difficult Person
Don Ruhl • Savage Street, Grants Pass, Oregon • May 13, In the year of our Lord, 2018
Prelude:
- Some things that I have observed in almost 38 years of preaching.
- Why are some people difficult?
- What can we do to keep from being difficult?
Persuasion:
- Are You Already a Difficult Person?
- First Corinthians 13.4–8a – Replace “love” with your name
4 [Don] suffers long and is kind; [Don] does not envy; [Don] does not parade [himself], [Don] is not puffed up; 5 [Don] does not behave rudely, [Don] does not seek its own, [Don] is not provoked, [Don] thinks no evil; 6 [Don] does not rejoice in iniquity, but [Don] rejoices in the truth; 7 [Don] bears all things, [Don] believes all things, [Don] hopes all things, [Don] endures all things. 8 [Don] never fails… (1Co 134–8a).
- Psalm 139.23–24 – Ask God to show you
23 Search me, O God, and know my heart;
Try me, and know my anxieties;
24 And see if there is any wicked way in me,
And lead me in the way everlasting.
(Psa 139.23–24)
- Will God answer such a prayer?
- Yes, He will:
- He is the One who teaches us to repent of wickedness.
- He is the One whose will our prayers must consider.
- Therefore, if we pray for Him to show us whether we are difficult,
- He will do it, because
- it is His will and
- He wants us to repent of any and all evil within us.
- Observe how others react to you
- We often do not see ourselves as others see us.
- We are biased for ourselves,
25 There is a way that seems right to a man,
But its end is the way of death.
(Pro 16.25)6 Most men will proclaim each his own goodness,
But who can find a faithful man?
(Pro 20.6)
- Listen to the Book of Proverbs
8 Do not correct a scoffer, lest he hate you;
Rebuke a wise man, and he will love you.
(Proverbs 9.8)
- Watch Jesus and the Pharisees
- As you watch them in action,
- do you find yourself imitating Jesus or the Pharisees?
- Do you exhibit the works of the flesh or the fruit of the Spirit?
- Galatians 5.19–23 Your name for “the flesh” and “the Spirit”
- Does love top a list of godly characteristics in your life?
- Colossians 3.12–14
- Do you exhibit wisdom and understanding?
- James 5.13–18
- Do you boast in your oddness, difficult nature, uncooperative spirit, et al.?
- Can you admit you are wrong?
- Do you blame others for your wrong?
- Do you acknowledge faults, but claim that others made you do it?
- First Corinthians 13.4–8a – Replace “love” with your name
- How Then Can I Keep from Being a Difficult Person?
- Seek to Understand Rather Than to Be Understood
- Everyone wants to be understood, but
- if you only focus upon that,
- you will get frustrated, because
- your dealings with people will become one way only.
- All the focus will be upon you.
- Pray: (Francis of Assisi)
O divine Master,
grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;
to be understood, as to understand;
to be loved, as to love;
for it is in giving that we receive,
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned,
and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life.
- Everyone wants to be understood, but
- Humble Yourself Before God and Submit to Him
- By this you acknowledge that you are not God.
- Have you ever met a person
- who humbled himself before God and submitted to Him, but
- was also a difficult person?
- Understand How God Works
- When we have preconceived ideas on how God should work,
- we get frustrated and
- show it toward God.
- Preconceived ideas crucified Christ.
- Israel in the wilderness provides an example of this kind of thinking.
- When we have preconceived ideas on how God should work,
- Exercise Self-Control
- Every difficult person I know has problems exercising self-control,
- if not in all areas of life,
- at least in some crucial ones.
- Self-control is of the fruit of the Spirit.
- Galatians 5
22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law (Galatians 5.16–26).
- Look at the associates of self-control.
- Galatians 5
- Every difficult person I know has problems exercising self-control,
- Glorify God
- This is the point of life.
- Consider what sin is according to Romans 3.23.
- Difficult people rarely give consideration
- to glorifying anyone other than themselves.
- If you make glorifying God the goal of your life,
- you will see the issues of your life
- from a different perspective.
- Rather than frustration with the fact that things do not go your way,
- you will see your circumstances as ways of glorifying God.
- Consider Haman
- Help Others
- Difficult people do not serve others, but
- expect to be served.
- Helping others is why Christians still live on the earth.
- Ephesians 2.8–10
- Difficult people do not serve others, but
- Read the Book of Proverbs
- It comes right out and tells you what a difficult person is.
- It also shows you the successful way in life.
- Today is the 13th day of the month, so consider Proverbs 13.
- Seek to Understand Rather Than to Be Understood
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